....Smell my feet...

Give me something good to eat!


Halloween is this amazing day when you can be whomever?...whoever?..grr whatever you desire to be.  I have so many fun memories from Halloween going all the way until I was a teenager and Kristi and I used to plan our costumes for MONTHS. I remember being a pink carebear one year and my mom bought me one of those store bought cheap plastic costumes that we all wore in the 80's.  I got two houses in to trick or treating, fell and ripped the legs.  HALLOWEEN FAIL!  Sorry, no pic to go with that gem of a memory.  Don't worry, I still managed to get tons of candy.  ;)  I also remember being Strawberry shortcake and we had the most ADORABLE costume.  Real dress, tights, hat, makeup.... what did the stubborn little me do?  REFUSED to wear the hat so I was just a dressed up blond kid.  Now that I am raising a mini me who would have done the EXACT same thing I just have to say.... sorry mom. hahahaha! 

All of my other memories are of me making my own costume.  (gee, I wonder why?) I was a punk rocker one year, a princess, a cat... there are so many.  Then that weird thing happened where you go out one year and just feel like you have overstayed your welcome.  I got too old to trick or treat on the outside but still loved it on the inside.  I still got to pick out and carve a pumpkin (WOOT!) but there would be no more dressing up unless there was a party.  No more pillowcases full of candy. No more school parades. No more planning costumes.... I was a officially a big kid and had to sit it out.

...Then I had kids....








I love being able to decorate for their little faces which light up every time they catch a glimpse of something festive.  







I love that I know exactly what they are feeling and just want to bottle it up so that they never have to outgrow it.  I couldn't wait to have children so I could bring back the fun of all the holidays.  When we got pregnant with Natalie I could hardly wait! There are SO MANY wonderful things about Natalie that make her just perfect.  She will hopefully enjoy the magic of holidays a little longer (even if she doesn't, I am just going to pretend).  

One of the things that I wasn't prepared for though was how long it would take for her to comprehend the difference between any old day and Halloween.  I expected the first year to go by like any child's first Halloween.  We continued to dress her up each year and do all the fun things but she just didn't seem to understand why we made her look like a bug for a day. haha  

Well, this year....

...this was THE year!  I nearly cried when Cliff's mom got her a Tinkerbell costume and she seemed to really get that it would be something amazing to wear.  I put it on her for school on Friday for their celebrations and she *gasp* LOVED IT!  MY GIRL HAS ARRIVED!  Like everything in our life with her.... it was oh so worth the wait.





Sunday evening we pulled it out again and off we went to do a little trick or treating. Alyssa was jazzed beyond belief that we were not only going to let her wear that bunny costume again but that she would get to parade all over the neighborhood in it.  It was so hot out but that girl would not take the hood off to save her life.  


She was excited to say the least...I might have been a teeny bit excited myself.  

Before you ask, I was an orange m&m thank you very much.  ;)  If you knew me in college then you have seen that costume before.
 






Natalie had school the next day so she went home all pooped out and ready for bed.  Alyssa and I headed over to Kelly's house for a little extra time out with friends.

This year was amazing! They got it, they felt it...and Halloween has come alive once again.  We went from two girls last year who had no idea what was going on, to two girls this year who LOVED it all!  Life is good.  

We may not be rich or drive the best cars.  We may not go on lavish vacations or dress to the nine's but for us that's not really what this journey is all about.  We live for this...





....and that is all we have ever wanted.

Wordless Wednesday...

The smell of childhood...

I love Fall.  Anyone who knows me knows how much I stalk it, waiting for the weather to change, hunting for the first changing leaf and the feel of cool, crisp air.  LOVE IT!  

When I lived in NY I took it all for granted.  I never really thought about it thought that that was how Fall was everywhere.  I used to spend entire afternoons just driving all over Rochester looking at leaves and smelling that "smell" that is Fall.  LOVE IT!  I loved growing up going to Powers market and Shutts and getting apple cider.  Powers has these amazing teepees that they have put up every single year for as long as I can remember.  FREAKING LOVE IT!  

Fall should smell like apples and spice and the promise of crunchy leaves everywhere you walk.  I miss it.  I miss it all way more than I thought I would.  Don't get me wrong, we have great Autumns here in GA too.  The leaves change color, they just aren't as vibrant but the weather is gorgeous everyday with bright blue skies.  Today it was 78 degrees.  It is beautiful......but I still miss the crispy weather and the smell that doesn't seem to happen down here.  I think it is the lack of Oak trees but I'm not sure. Anyway, I decided not to miss it anymore!  Last year I took Alyssa up to Rochester to visit my family and instead of going in the summer (why would I do that?  I live in perpetual summer as it is haha) we went in Oct.  My awesome mother in law came and stayed at our house to help with Natalie after school every day.  She left her house and ended up being here a total of 11 days!!!  THANK YOU!!!!!  

O.M.G How I have missed my stomping grounds in the Fall!  So a tradition has started.  I took her again this year.  She is born and bred here in GA but I tell ya, that girl has some NY in her yet.  Into her jeans and long sleeves she went.  Jacket?  HECK YEAH!  She instinctively knew to jump in every leaf pile no matter how big or small.  That's my girl!!  We got to Powers and each got a donut and cider.  HELL YEAH!  My girl knows how to rock the heck outta some Fall.  :)

We visited with my cousin Lindsay and her boys one day.  Seriously, could they be any cuter?

Thanks to facebook I have reconnected with my very first friend.  We met when we were 3 and went all the way through school together until 10th grade when she moved.  I hadn't seen her since....until now :)

We made it over to visit my grandma's grave this year too.  Alyssa is named after her and I really wanted a photo of her there.  She walked up to the grave and did this weird thing that she only does when she meets someone new.   Am I the only one who finds that kind of cool?  I can't help but feel like she was there that afternoon to "meet" her great granddaughter. 

Last year Alyssa sat on the grave for a few photos then randomly jumped up, ran over to me, gave me a huge hug, then ran back and sat down.  

Notice she is wearing the same jacket....at least the sleeves are unfolded this year ;)  Call me sappy but in some way or another she is there to see us too.  Hi Grandma!  We "hear" you. <3

We stayed with my other cousin Chad for a night too.  Somehow I managed to not get ANY photos of them or their adorable son Andrew.  I KNOW!  sigh  The rest of the time we stayed with my cousin Kerry.  Kerry and I are like sisters and she is the closest thing I will ever know to one.  She is the girl yin to my yang.  ;)  

Logan took this one and directed us to "make a funny face".... think alike much?

Her kids are 5 and 6 now which freaking blows my mind.  Weren't they just born?  I hate being so far away and missing their day to day lives.  Kerry if you read this... MOVE HERE ALREADY!  hahaha  Did you see how I worked that in here like that?  Stealth.

So as if the trip could not have rocked any more, we packed up and went camper camping at the same campground that our parents used to take us to when we were kids!  LOVE!  

I have such vivid memories of this place that I could actually walk right to the place where we used to tent camp.  Kerry and I stood there a min in silence.  I wonder if she was seeing the mini versions of us like I was.  <3  The playground was the same down to the equipment.  How crazy is that?!  

Highest slide EVER.  They just don't make 'em like this anymore.....I wonder why.

 

It is weird for me to walk around places where I grew up since I moved away when I was 20.  Down here no one knows me before 1997 and up there no one knows me after then.  I think that is why I enjoy seeing all of these places so much.  I love being able to show and share my past with my children since there really isn't a way for them to experience it down here.  SO FUN FUN FUN!  

Kerry was sweet enough to try and actually get a photo with me in it.  No toddlers were injured in the making of this blog...

Cute pic:

The reality of getting a photo with a 2 year old who loves to hang upside down. hahahaha! 

Meanwhile back at home a bored Natalie had to learn how to live without Alyssa for a week...

Doing wheelbarrow walking without someone to hold her feet.  Her sister was missing to race with her. :(

Chatting with her reflection?...

I have no idea.... ;)

As much as they can get on each others nerves, it is amazing what a strong bond and friendship our girls already have.  They hugged when they saw each other again and as much as I absolutely LOVE visiting Rochester, there just isn't anything that can compare to having my family under one roof again.

Ahhhh Friday.....WHAT!? It's Wednesday??

 A week in the life of a full moon.... Oh wait, it's only Wednesday.....a half week then?  A kinda week?  Whatever....

Monday:  FUN field trip with Natalie's class to the farm.  So fun!  Seriously, did  I mention how fun it was?  I LOVE that I am the parent at a field trip.  It is so weird to not have to worry about everything and just get to enjoy my child doing something new.  No planning, no gathering parent consent forms, no worrying if anyone is touching the wrong end of one of the farm animals, no dealing with buses and the where and whens of all that mess.  It ROCKED!  Natalie has been very "in her head" and overly sensory the last few weeks so she didn't do as much as I thought she would.  She wouldn't touch the animals (except the baby chicks and ducklings...awwww)  She has learned how to be gentle from having the cats all of her life (and a little sister) and it is so freaking adorable when she whips out her nurturing side.   For those of you who really know her, you know that she is not exactly the huggy, love all over me type so really.......in the words of Chandler Bing.... "Could she BE any cuter!?"

Being "in her head" means she is living more to satisfy what feels good or looks cool.... so there was a lot of this:

The teacher in me was all  "Why won't you pay attention to the animals...we are freaking LEARNING here!"  Meanwhile the mom/therapist in me was all "DID YOU JUST SEE HER SCALE THAT FENCE!?"  "That's MY baby girl!".....The gross motor, fine motor, cognitive planning, balance...that went into that was a sight to see I tell you!  It's odd having a child with special needs because you just can't help but celebrate everything they do.  Even if that means being super excited on the inside when they scale nasty, dirty, animal pen fences that you just KNOW are covered in all kinds of disgusting things we won't talk about.....I think I just threw up in my mouth a little.......but did you SEE HER SCALE THAT FENCE PEOPLE??!!  

Tuesday:

So we survived the farm and moved right into a nice little Tuesday....dun dun DUUUUUN!  That was scary music for those of you with no imaginations who couldn't tell.  Day started off with a trip to the Chiropractor which is the best EVER!  Before we go I do the mommy voiced "Do you have to go potty because so help me god if you pee in my car or in his office..."  She peed.....then did a little doody for me.  Somewhere in the back of my head I notice it smells a bit off (yes, more so than poop usually does....shut it, I am a stay at home mom now, I notice this kind of craptastic stuff) and kind of a light color. (she makes me look so she can get an m&m ok?  Stop judging)  Off to the Chiro, then the grocery store.  Two hours later we are back home.  She runs into the bathroom and I hear a scary splatter.  WTH?  Was that pee hitting the walls?  Did she run over a cat on the way in there?  Seriously....can I just leave and pretend I don't live here?  Then  shudder I walk in to find her SCREAMING and standing in a poo puddle that looked like it shot out of her tush like it was in a cannon.  CRAPTASTIC SHITASTROPHE!   gag, gag, I cleaned her and the entire bathroom up.  I use all natural homemade cleaners only but I keep one little pack of clorox wipes in the back under the sink for just this level of toxic disinfecting.  Her butt is now safely in a diaper.  gag

Fast forward about an hour and her stomach is all distended and all I could think was "dear lord, please, PLEASE let this only be a back end issue, please don't let her start puking all over like the exorcist."  We have lived that fun before when both girls got rotavirus....within days of each other....gag. gag. blah!  So her stomach is all hard and I am asking her to go potty over and over until she finally goes in and then......then........gag....then her body opened up and out came everything she has ever eaten...EVER.  It was almost amazing if it wasn't so incredibly disgusting.  Her poor little eyes all bugged out like she could not believe what was happening either.  All I could think was "YES!  NOT PUKE!".....seriously, this is the life of a stay at home mom.   Stay in school kids!  She takes a nap and the rest of the day is fine except that I am on total poop patrol and terrified of spraying at any moment.  

Wednesday: aka the day before the full moon.  Poopy head girl seems almost back to normal except for being a little tired.  We lounge and enjoy some mommy daughter time.  Ahhhh so awesome.  She goes down for a nap like an angel (am I the only one who ALWAYS types angle first and has to fix it?  Just saying) and I think I am in the clear.  I eat lunch...can this really be the day before a full moon?  Then the shedevil wakes up early in a mood like no other.  For real.....the tears....were....endless.  The whining, the fighting with Natalie.  Poor Natalie could do no right today.  Every toy the poor thing picked up Alyssa would charge at her like the running of the bulls screaming "MINE!  MINE NATALIE!"  Natalie finally gave up and just started taking her things and running off with them for fun.  Hey, if you can't beat em....  This is what 3 hours of this afternoon looked like.

Is that not the most pathetic little look ever?  I feel like she was my own personal leach because I can't just leave her there to look like that.  sigh

So now I am exhausted from playing ref, nurse, mom, maid, taxi, wife, chef, poop picker upper.  It is 8:15 on Friday Wednesday and I need a vacation.  Just so you don't think I can't find the silver lining in my happy life bubble I will leave you with some eye candy from when Natalie and I were playing.  Ahhhhhhhh.....it's a little like Calgon without all the bubbles and relaxing and.....wait, what was I saying?

Wordless Wednesday

Mini goes to Clemson...

I have literally waited for this day since I was one of the lucky students at Clemson.  I used to walk that campus thinking that I could just stay there forever and be perfectly content.  It is like belonging to the largest family ever!  I remember painting tiger paws on little kids faces at the football games thinking "someday I will be the one bringing my kids here".  We took Natalie to her first tailgate when she was still a baby.  

 She of course had the time of her life.  ;)

Well it started to happen again. That feel of something great yet to happen.  You can literally feel it in the air as football season starts.  Let me cut myself off her to tell you that I HATE football...all football except Tiger football anyway.  I LOVE Clemson games.  The tailgating, the sea of orange, beer, the sound of the canon as our boys run down the hill, the food and my favorite part....our friends.   

This is not just a keg...this is a contraption that our friend Paul has that eliminates the need to pump the keg... we have arrived...

Paul doing the honors

Taking Alyssa was amazingly fun.  She was calm and well behaved and I think she felt "it" too.  You can almost see her blood turning orange.  

I love that we can take her tailgating and to the games now and she loves it.  She picked out a new baby (of course!) at Bi-lo and who am I to say no when my girl wants a baby covered in orange, a paw and looking oh so adorable.  Add in a sippy of water, some crackers and you have her day in a nutshell. 

I haven't been to an opening game since I was pregnant with Natalie and I was like a kid on Christmas morning.  I couldn't WAIT to go back "home".  It really is a place that sucks you in and becomes a part of you.  At one point I just stood back and realized how far Cliff and I had come since that night we met there.  WE are the family there and I am so ok with letting the college years go in exchange for what I get to live now.

We were there for the football but in reality that is such a small part of the day.  The day is about friends and laughing and letting go of stressful work weeks to just "be". We are making memories for ourselves and in turn making memories for Alyssa.  Ones I hope that she can look back on with contentment for years to come.

After all, isn't that what this is all really about?